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Amy
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 Posted: 09:44 pm

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:lmao:::rotfl::

Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the
back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.


Only in America ......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries,
and a diet coke.


Only in America ......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.


Only in America! ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the
driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.




Only in America ......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.


Only in America ......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'.


Only in America ......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering.

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UsedToRide
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 Posted: 09:51 pm

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Way to open the door with a big sign that reads,

WELCOME NINJA!!!!  COME IN AND MAKE FUN OF THE COUNTRY!!!!

Too bad those are all true.  :lmao: ::rotfl:: ::LOL:: 




Respect some, trust one, fear none
~~Bullet
http://www.freeholbrook.com
The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons.
~~Dostoyevsky
Amy
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...going with the flow...
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 Posted: 09:58 pm

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UsedToRide wrote: Way to open the door with a big sign that reads,

WELCOME NINJA!!!!  COME IN AND MAKE FUN OF THE COUNTRY!!!!

Too bad those are all true.  :lmao: ::rotfl:: ::LOL:: 


:oops:  :runscared:

 

but yeah...unfortunately can't argue with any of those.  :giantgrin:
UsedToRide
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 Posted: 10:16 pm

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But still....the day I let a person's opinion stop me from posting what I want to is the day I become a Mexican.  It is still damn funny!




Respect some, trust one, fear none
~~Bullet
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The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons.
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cynicalninja
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 Posted: 01:21 am

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I was looking for truly horrible insulting jokes because I knew UTR would get a kick out of them.

This one is marginally funny...........

How many American tourists does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifteen. Five to figure out how much the bulb costs in the local currency, four to comment on "how funny-looking" local lightbulbs are, three to hire a local person to change the bulb, two to take pictures, and one to buy postcards in case the pictures don't come out.

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 Posted: 01:32 am

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Ha ! perhaps reality hits the funny bone ?

Radio Transcript
This is a transcript of an actual radio conversation of a US Naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. The transcipt of the Radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval operations on the 10th october 1995.
Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.
Canadians: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid collision.
Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy Ship, I say again, divert your course.
Canadians: Number One, I say again, divert your course.
Americans: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic fleet. We are accompanied by three destroyers, three cruisers and numerous support vessels. I demand that you change your course 15 degrees north. Thats on five degrees north, or counter measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.
Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call.

Erinna1112
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 Posted: 02:41 am

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That's an urban legend, which you would have found out if you'd done five seconds of research on it. It would be exceedingly surprising if there was a captain of any US Navy ship that was unacquainted with the locations of lighthouses.
UsedToRide
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 Posted: 02:56 am

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Erinna1112 wrote: That's an urban legend, which you would have found out if you'd done five seconds of research on it. It would be exceedingly surprising if there was a captain of any US Navy ship that was unacquainted with the locations of lighthouses.
Well, ya know....any opportunity to dump on America, whether it's true or not.   :doh: Did I not call it from my first reply?




Respect some, trust one, fear none
~~Bullet
http://www.freeholbrook.com
The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons.
~~Dostoyevsky
Outré
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 Posted: 01:47 am

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cynicalninja wrote:
... and one to buy postcards in case the pictures don't come out.

:lmao:::rotfl::
My family, my husband's family and the families of several friends used to do this when we'd go to the Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Mackinac Island, rainforest in Oregon, Painted Desert, Black Hills - you name it, they bought postcards in case the pictures didn't turn out.

However, I can attest that it's not ONLY American tourist that do this. Living in Palm Springs, CA you see tourists from Canada, Switzerland, the UK, France and Germany in the stores and on the roads all winter. They buy the postcards and do things like....make a right turn from a left turn lane across five lanes of traffic on a 55 mph highway. No not freeway - highway in town.

I think that ALL people act up and act out when out of their own country. It's not isolated to just one country or ethnic background.

Last edited on 01:55 am by Outré
Outré
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 Posted: 02:14 am

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Amy wrote:
:lmao:::rotfl::

Only in America ......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braillelettering.


::chuckle:: I always wondered about this...what do they do - swap seats?

::LOL::
cynicalninja
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 Posted: 02:20 am

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Erinna1112 wrote:

 It would be exceedingly surprising if there was a captain of any US Navy ship that was unacquainted with the locations of lighthouses.
Uh-huh, to you maybe, not to the rest of the planet.

Sorry don't take my little jokes too seriously, think of them as "friendly fire".

 
cynicalninja
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 Posted: 02:22 am

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UsedToRide wrote: Erinna1112 wrote: That's an urban legend, which you would have found out if you'd done five seconds of research on it. It would be exceedingly surprising if there was a captain of any US Navy ship that was unacquainted with the locations of lighthouses.
Well, ya know....any opportunity to dump on America, whether it's true or not.   :doh: Did I not call it from my first reply?

Oh yeah sorry I'm actually replying to an old thread.

I forgot this was the period when our resident sisters were tag teaming me.

::thumbs::
UsedToRide
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 Posted: 02:31 am

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I forgot this was the period when our resident sisters were tag teaming me.

 
::cryer::  ::bigcry:: :cry:
 




Respect some, trust one, fear none
~~Bullet
http://www.freeholbrook.com
The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons.
~~Dostoyevsky
cynicalninja
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 Posted: 03:01 am

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UsedToRide wrote: I forgot this was the period when our resident sisters were tag teaming me.

 
::cryer::  ::bigcry:: :cry:
 


I thought you said you were........(enable dark and forboding church organ tone)......."Done with me ?".

:runscared:::surp:::scared:::shock::::questioner::::omg::

Obviously not.

:yawn::zzz:

  

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UsedToRide
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 Posted: 03:05 am

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And didn't I invite you to learn the meaning of that phrase from any Biker other than me?  I suggest you do so before getting too sanctimonious.  I believe the one you are thinking of is "back turned". 




Respect some, trust one, fear none
~~Bullet
http://www.freeholbrook.com
The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons.
~~Dostoyevsky

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